There’s something about saying “8 months” that is tough and emotional for this momma. There’s only one more single digit month. Then we hit double digits. Then we hit ONE YEAR. And that just doesn’t seem possible.
Henry is nonstop and all boy. He’s constantly on the go and into everything. He is absolutely fearless. The thing I love most about my sweet boy is how friendly he is. While pregnant I prayed many things over Henry (at the time “Baby M” or “it”). One of the things I kept asking for was that Henry would have a genuine love for people – to serve and care for them, and to just be friendly! So far, his personality is just that – very friendly. He smiles and giggles at everyone. So far, he hasn’t met a stranger. My hope is that his smile turns into a kind and generous heart towards others.
We were iced in for a few days. I thought I might go nuts, but honestly it wasn’t that bad! I’m home most days so it didn’t feel that different. The bonus was lots of time just the three of us. It was too cold for Jesse to work in the garage, so some of his projects were put on hold. We had lots of good family time.
The Saturday after Thanksgiving Jesse and I were supposed to stay at The Adolphus. We left that morning to have lunch in Dallas and then went to the Perot Museum. We checked into the hotel that afternoon and eventually got a phone call that Henry had been throwing up nonstop. We had to checkout less than two hours later and headed home to take Henry to the ER because he was dehydrated. *We didn’t have to stay because people prayed for the little badger, and almost immediately he started perking up and kept water down. But I must say, I officially feel like a mom because I wasn’t worried about the money or our missed stay at The Adolphus – I was just worried that Henry was alright.
This month has been a special one for me as a mom. The Lord has been gracious to answer my prayer for restored joy. You know those girls/ladies/women who say things like “I just didn’t know I could love someone so much. Being a mom is the greatest thing in the world. Etc. Etc. Etc.” I don’t know that I’m that mom. And if I have said those things – I was honestly probably just trying to save face and make you think that I was more awesome than I am. I do feel an incredible amount of love for this kid. And I know that I’d do anything for him, but can I just be honest? There have been several days where I just feel stuck in a rut. I’m a doer. I’m a check it off the list kind of girl. And I’ve found that it’s tough to check things off when you’re taking care of a baby. You change a diaper, just to do it again in a couple of hours (sometimes in a couple of minutes). You wake up, feed, play, nap, feed, play nap, repeat, repeat, repeat, every. single. day. My heart felt weary. I felt like I wasn’t being productive. I felt like I wasn’t me. Something felt off. I’m confident that the Lord has called me to stay at home and raise this little boy. I felt like I traded in big, good, exciting things for something not so exciting and not so good. I know that’s not true, but it’s where my heart was. In the processing of all my emotions and thoughts, the Lord gave me joy. And I think he increased my perspective – that the everyday little things are working towards a big, great thing. I still say this is the most stretching and sanctifying season of life so far. I feel like everyday the Lord is gracious to show me more of his goodness.